I have heard a lot of people around campus say that they have gotten the assignment to write a blog. Why do I wish I was in that class. I write stuff for my English class and I honestly wonder if its really getting read. I'm not too hurt about it if its not being read, but I wish I had extra incentive to continue my blogging...or vloging for that matter. I think I would really love to sit and tell the stories of my life to a camera over writing them here. I know some people can hear my voice as I type, but not all can. If I could show my expression as well in word perhaps it wouldn't be as intimidating to me to just write out some of the stuff I've learned and the things I've gone through.
I went to dinner with a couple friends. One I know better than the other. So I decided to tell my history of being a student here in Idaho to the girl who didn't know me too well. I was giving dates and filling in cool/interesting stories every now and then. Some with more excitement and enthusiasm than others. I have no idea why I think its fun to tell some stories and not others. Like the time I was dared to take a picture of the kid that worked at the chiropractor (so I did) and later that summer I went to the temple with him and his friends. Why can I not even remember that kids last name right now. I even wrote him a few letters on his mission. Or the time I got a kid fired from a job on my first day working there. (that's a cool story for a good reason) My boss, who was the owner and my old Sunday school teacher, actually called and asked me how my first day went. Turns out I really didn't need to say anything. A prompting in the middle of the night woke him up and made him go to the place we were cleaning and he saw how the night went for us. As he tells it, they would've lost the cleaning contract if he hadn't woken up and gone to check our work. The kid leading me that night never did get to finish the week of work. Or there are the stories of the guys I've somehow gotten myself involved with. I don't know if I should be embarrassed or glad that I never did end up with any of them. Its not until I start telling stories that I realize that I have had quite the multicultural dating experience (online counts right?...for the sake of my stories it does) There was the Peruvian, the Brazilian, the Indian, the African, the Mexican.....those are some of the ways my stories start. The "crazy" is usually another descriptive word I use too. I should be more kind. The only truly clinically "crazy" one was the blind schizophrenic one from Idaho actually. I would never take back any lesson learned but some days why I chose to learn them the way I did. ay yay yay. My self worth and testimony were never challenged as much until I was actually dating. How do you not find out for yourself when someone you are around every day decides to try and convince you that your beliefs are false? I don't know if I'll ever really understand why opposition is so strong. I know we should welcome change but that inevitably means hard times will come. Just a few weeks ago I was up on cloud 9. I knew it would rain me out soon enough. I don't really mean for that to sound depressing or anything. Just that...its time for me to do hard things. I'm having some growing pains I guess. BYU Idaho is a great place. I get that. I like being here most days. I just don't think I have to fake like everyday is a great day. I have been blessed with a few great classmates and a few smiling friendly faces, but I've also been blessed to know what its like to feel alone in a huge crowd. Not a blessing I particularly asked for. I'm not really sure who is reading this, but I don't think it hurts for anyone to. I have to be up in a few hours...best be getting my beauty rest.
1 comment:
I'm reading. :)
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