11w5d

Brett's been dying for me to start writing about this pregnancy and my feelings. I thought since I slept most of the day away earlier that now would be an ok time to start writing. Plus I know it'll get harder to remember things the further along I get in this pregnancy. I already don't know the exact day we found out. 

I think that has become a blur because I wasn't sure I could believe it. The first test I took was real classy. I was being impatient and thought....hmm it's a few days early to check but let's give it a go because the last day of a honeymoon would be cool to find out you're pregnant. Well it was only a faint yes which in my mind meant don't get your hopes up. The funny thing about this whole pee in a cup pregnancy test stuff is that I used a Wall Drug cup that Brett had brought home for a souvenir. Needless to say we no longer have that cup. Anyway the next day I convinced Brett to get the Walmart brand test where you can test a few days early. It also gave us a faint yes. Again I didn't believe it because I was looking on the package and the percentage for its accuracy weren't that high so I looked up reviews online (something I would normally never do FYI) and this particular product had many complaints about false positives. Do you see why I still wasn't convinced I was having a baby. Oh btw the second test in the package I didn't believe either because it was an early morning test the next day and I hadn't used a cup and it was a mess. I just remember thinking well I didn't do that right. I'll have to get another test. So we ended up getting the name brand one on a Monday. I should've started that day so I figured between this two line action stick and a digital yes or no stick. We would for sure know soon. I had Brett there with me while I had the timer going. I don't think we even had to wait the full time before the two lines clearly and obviously appeared. I cried and we hugged. It wasn't until a couple days later that I decided we should take a picture with our positive test. I love that picture. 

It's been an interesting, rough, challenging couple of months. However this is one challenge I've been looking forward to for a long time. Being a newly wed newly pregnant woman is an emotional roller coaster ride. I can say I love being married but I'm not in love with being pregnant yet. There have been funny and rewarding moments but only after lots of headaches, cramps, soreness, and lots of lazy sleepy days. I'll never forget how cool it was to see our baby's heartbeat for the first time. But I feel bad for days like today where I was laying on the couch feeling yucky and tired watching Brett do his Insanity workout. I feel like my insides are doing all of what he was doing in the living room today. I am super lucky that although I have serious nausea problems I have not had to actually puke even once. I can feel fevers come and go. I can sleep more hours than seem humanly possible. But I have had some energetic days or moments. I'm not wanting to rush anything of this experience away but I really look forward to the second trimester where I hear it gets easier. 

I haven't gained any weight as of yet. Thankfully I had lost at least 15 right before I got married. All of my clothes still fit but I really hate wearing pants. Anything tight on my stomach is super uncomfortable. 

I usually am super hot too. I never imagined it being like this. I'm always the cold one. That still holds true for my feet and nose but I push Brett's heater of a body away too much. I want him to be close but I'm way picky and moody. He's been so good to fix me breakfast and fill up my water cup for me all the time. He even went out to Walmart without me tonight to pick up vitamins and Tylenol and ice cream. 

I haven't had too many cravings so far. The strangest thing is that buttered toast always sounds really good to me. I eat bagels with cream cheese way too much too. I've been trying to eat lots of fruit. Bananas and grapes mostly. But eating healthy is hard when I really have no energy to cook. I'm worried about getting gestational diabetes. I've got fairly high blood pressure but... Today I was shocked. At my doctors appointment they took it the first time and it was 141/85 or something. Then she came back and took it on my left arm 15 later it was 119/41. I think I just have a form of white coat syndrome or something. 

I've been to see a chiropractor twice already too because sleeping is rough. I favor sleeping on my right side which has hurt my arm and neck in the process. Hopefully I can get a good pillow or something figured out soon to help that issue. 

I guess this isn't a super touchy feely blog. I just wanted to document some of this process and remind myself how blessed I am even though it's hard.